Margaret, Mother of God (and Gabby)

Well, it's a normal night in the Abruzzi household. Jake is "practicing" his trumpet, Gabby's mother is visiting, and Gus has a shiner on his left eye that would make a pro wrestler cringe. Gabby's mother or "gross mommy" as the kids call her, is the ultimate Swiss female nightmare. She is seemingly pleasant and sweet, but after you spend more than a minute with her, you begin to notice the extreme passive aggressivety. She also has the true European grandma thing down. As you wave off an eighth helping of egg salad (OMG I do NOT eat egg salad) she widens her overly made up eyes and says in horror, "You do not like my cooking?" I mean what are you supposed to say? "No no, I like it really, it's just that if I eat it I might explode and then black out and face plant into the bacon and cheese encrusted chicken which, no, I won't eat because I am a vegetarian." To which she might reply, "What do you mean you are a vegetarian? Have some salami role instead" Then there are her political views, which are narrow at their widest. She doesn't like homosexuality, but Don and Erv who live down the street are fine because they are "nice people." The difference between them and every other gay person in the world? Only Margaret seems to know. Anyway, as usual, I left the dinner table stuffed to bursting and completely drunk on a wine and rum mixture that tastes like sangria but kicks like Riddle punch. (hey mom).
And then there's the black eye. Apparently, Gus was running forward, but looking backward when he was attacked by a vicious and mal-intentioned pole. His eye is literally magenta. I keep thinking he's wearing makeup. This happened while I was in Mass. for Halloween and apparently in my absence, Symon took great pleasure in mocking him. Symon is gone home to England. Bad, because I no longer have a late night TV and beer cohort, good, because I will longer stay up late at night watching TV and drinking beer.
Ah Halloween. I emerged from the fray with only a sprained ankle (obtained whilst cavorting across the Hampshire college lawn at 1 in the morning) and the princess dress on my back. It was a great night and I had a wonderful time in the arms and laps of my fellow Smithies. We danced, we sang, we ate, and we made merry and it was awesome. It was also a little surreal being in Northampton and in my house with all these new people I don't know. It's strange to think that while I have a great sense of entitlement to Lawrence and consider it more mine than it is the first year's, they look at me and wonder who that stranger is in their house. I'll show them when I come back for my senior year of triumph. Oh yes, it shall be epic. And with that, I shall leave you, for I have gotten a grand total of six hours of sleep in the last two days and my eyeballs are beginning to dry out and stick to my eye lids when I blink.